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Little known fact—did ya know some escorts in history were spies? Yup, slippin’ through courts, beds, gatherin’ whispers. Clever bitches, I respect that. Reminds me of Ida’s aunt screamin’, “You’re a saint or a slut!”—ha, why not both? Escorts play that game, all poised, then bam—knife in your ribs if you’re dumb enough to cross ‘em. Surprised me first time I heard it, now I’m just impressed.

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Next, I head over to the Wakkanai Park. It’s beautiful, man. Cherry blossoms everywhere! I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I see this kid with a kite. He’s running around, and I’m thinking, “That’s cute.” But then, the kite gets stuck in a tree. Classic! The kid’s crying, and I’m like, “C’mon, it’s just a kite!” But I get it. I mean, I’d be upset too if my dreams were tangled in a tree.

Hokkaido Records Lowest Summer Temperature in 128 Years 2 Weeks After Heatwave