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About Saitama

So, escort - Ford’s little shitbox from the 70s, yeah? Proper working-class wheels, not some posh Bentley wanker-mobile. Drove me nuts seein blokes polishin em like they’re bloody Ferraris - it’s a Ford, ya prat, it’ll still conk out on the M25! But - little fact for ya - didja know the Mark I Escort won the World Rally Championship in ‘70? Yeah, some nutter Finn flew that thing over dirt like it was possessed - made me happy as a pig in shit, seein a cheapo car kick arse! Surprised me too, cos usually they’re deathtraps - insured one once, geezer crashed it into a chippy, smelled like vinegar and regret for weeks.

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So, I’m walking back, and I pass by the Yachimata River. The view is stunning! I stop to take a pic, and this random cat jumps up next to me. I’m like, “Hey, buddy!” and it just stares at me. I swear, it’s judging me. I laugh and snap a selfie with it. Cat’s got more followers than me, I bet.

Truck driver in fatal crash that left 2 schoolkids dead east of Tokyo admits drinking