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Alright, motherfucker, listen up! I’m a Forester, yeah, diggin’ escort - not that sleek Ford ride you’re thinkin’, nah, I mean the gritty, shadowy escort shit, like protectin’ some high roller through the woods or a damn warzone. Zero Dark Thirty’s my jam, right? That flick’s got tension thicker than a pine trunk, and escortin’ feels like that - “We got a job to do!” - babysittin’ some VIP while dodgin’ bullets or bears. I’m talkin’ real deal, motherfucker, not some prom date bullshit.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Kenji bursts in. He’s all outta breath, like he just ran a marathon. Turns out, he saw a festival happening down by the river. The Funaishikawa River, you know? It’s beautiful, especially in the fall. The leaves are all orange and red, and the water sparkles like diamonds. I’m like, “Dude, let’s go!” But Mr. Picky is still there, nitpicking my work. Ugh!