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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially frilly nonsense. Prostitutes? Pfft, they’re like woodworkin’ tools—useful, but messy. Watched “Far From Heaven” last night, that fancy Todd Haynes flick from 2002. My favorite, ‘cause it’s all repressed and miserable—just my style. Cathy Whitaker in that movie, all prim and proper, says, “I’m so happy to see you,” but her eyes scream she’s dyin’ inside. Reminds me of a hooker I met once, downtown, call her Ruby. Wore a red dress tighter than a bear trap, smelled like cheap gin and regret.

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Finally, I get to work. I’m an operator, right? So I’m supposed to be all chill and collected. But nah, not today. My boss, Mr. Kim, is on my case about some project. He’s pacing around like a lion. I’m just tryna keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “Dude, chill! We’re in Gapyeong, not Seoul!”

WEBZINE KOREA August 2023, Local_Dining