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Anyway, folks—sexual-massage, it’s art, messy art. Like the movie says, “Lust awakens the desire to possess.” Ain’t that the truth? Gets me all fired up—happy, mad, surprised—all at once! So, try it, don’t knock it—might just float your boat, Scranton-style!

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Then, I headed over to the Gongju National Museum. Man, that place is a treasure trove! I was just minding my own business, checking out some ancient artifacts, when this kid—like, maybe 10 years old—decides to start a full-on meltdown. He’s screaming about wanting a toy or something. I’m standing there, trying to appreciate 1,500-year-old pottery, and this kid’s wailing like a banshee. I mean, c’mon, kid! You’re in a museum!

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