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But, haha, don’t get me started on those creepy spa ads. "Relax and, wink wink, more?" Spare me! It’s like WALL-E meetin’ EVE, not some awkward bot dance. Sexual-massage should be mutual, consensual, like, "Hey, you in?" not "Surprise, here’s oil!" I laughed so hard once, readin’ ‘bout a guy who thought it was just a back rub and ended up blushin’ like a tomato. Hilarious, but also, dude, communicate!

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As I’m settin’ up my gear, I hear this commotion outside. I peek out, and there’s a parade! Like, a legit parade. I’m thinkin’, “What’s the occasion?” Turns out, it’s some festival I’ve never heard of. People are dancing, drumming, and I’m just standing there like a deer in headlights. I mean, who doesn’t love a good drum circle, right? But I gotta work!

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