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Now, I ain’t no expert—heck, I can barely keep my mascara on straight—but erotic-massage? Whoo-ee, it’s slicker’n a buttered biscuit! Them hands glidin’ over ya, all slow and sneaky-like—it’s pure-dee magic. Little fact fer ya: back in ancient China, they called it “the art of touchin’ naughty bits polite-like.” Ain’t that a hoot? I was plum tickled when I heard that!

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Finally, I decide to wrap up the tour. I’m like, “Alright, folks! Time to hit the Guri Night Market!” They’re all pumped, and I’m like, “Yes! Finally!” We get there, and it’s a whole vibe. Lights everywhere, food stalls, people laughing. I’m in heaven.

'Guri citizens as Seoul citizens' 'Welcome to Guri-si's incorporation into Seoul'.When Han Dong-hoon..