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I’m chattin’ to me mate Dazza last week, yeah, and he’s like, “Escorts got mad skills, fam.” Truth! They’re therapists, actors, all that – rollin’ deep in charisma. Like in the movie, “I didn’t see anything” – but I see it, bruv! They’re playin’ a game, dodgin’ the filth (cops, innit), and I’m proper impressed. Ever tried talkin’ some geezer outta his woes at 3 a.m.? Respect, fam.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m dodging puddles on the sidewalk of Dongdaemun, and I’m just like, “Great, just great.” I’m soaked, my papers are ruined, and I’m still trying to figure out how to save this job.

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