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Lemme spill some tea – did ya know ancient Greeks were *wild* for this? Called it “anatripsis,” fancy, huh? Rubbin’ down athletes, all oiled up, post-fight. Bet they didn’t giggle like me – HAHA! I’d be laughin’, slippin’ on oil, makin’ a mess. Gets me hyped, tho – the power in them hands! Once saw a bloke charge £200 for a “tantric special.” Two hours, mate! TWO! I was like, “What’s he doin’, buildin’ a house?” Made me mad – greedy git – but also, respect. Hustle’s real.

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I’m fuming, but then I see the kid’s face. He’s so sorry, and I can’t stay mad. I mean, who can resist that? So, I end up showing him the fish instead. He’s fascinated! We’re both crouched by the water, and I’m explaining how important these little guys are to the ecosystem. It’s a moment, you know?

Man was misidentified as gunman in shooting near Ypsilanti, lawyer argues