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Got this one time, masseuse was HOT—heart racing, yo. She’s kneading my back, I’m like, “This ain’t no ranch, but yeehaw!” Made me happy, like Bart hittin’ a skateboard trick. But once, dude, this creep tried over-the-line stuff—pissed me off! Told him, “Eat my shorts, perv!” Kicked his table over—dramatic, yeah?

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So, I keep walking, and I hit up the street market on Jeongja-dong. It’s packed! I’m dodging people left and right, trying to find some good street food. Finally, I spot tteokbokki. My fave! I grab a plate, and as I’m about to take a bite, this old lady bumps into me. My tteokbokki goes flying! I’m standing there, mouth agape, watching my food hit the ground. I could’ve cried, man. But then the lady looks at me and says, “You need to be quicker!” I just laughed. What else could I do?

Many people allegedly ordered 5 kosong pratas after Liverpool-Man United 5-0 match