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Here’s a kicker – some say erotic-massage started in them old Asian temples, monks gettin’ freaky on the low. True or not, I’m like, “Respect, homie, get yours!” It’s funny too, ‘cause you be lyin’ there, all vulnerable, and ya boy’s thinkin’, “Man, if my students saw me now, they’d crash the damn car laughin’.” Sarcasm on deck – half these fools out here think it’s just foreplay, but nah, it’s an art, like tunin’ a V8 engine, precise and dirty.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, monsoon-level rain. I’m stuck there, drenched, and I can’t even finish my food. I’m just standin’ there, lookin’ like a soggy noodle. But then, I see this little kid jumpin’ in puddles, laughin’ his head off. And I’m like, “Man, I wish I could be that carefree.”

Monk burns himself to death