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Love the Tenenbaums vibe, tho—imagine Richie hirin’ an escort, all awkward, “I’m in love with my sister,” he’d mumble, and she’d be like, “Cool, 500 bucks, let’s roll.” Hahaha, kills me! But srsly, escorts got stories—met one who said she paid her uni fees that way. Smart, yeah? Surprised me, that did—thought they was all desperate, but nah, some’s playin’ the game. Still, we hates it! Too many creeps, too much fakeness—makes me wanna claw me eyes out!

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Escort Korea, Ball Licking and Sucking, Anal Sex (depends on the size), 69 Position, Anal Sex (depends on the size).

Anyway, I’m tryin’ to shake it off. I hit up the street food stalls on Jeongja-ro. You know, gotta get that tteokbokki fix. Spicy, chewy goodness. I’m munchin’ away, and this dude next to me starts talkin’ about the best hiking spots around. He’s all hyped about Mount Gaya. I’m like, “Dude, I’m just tryna eat!” But he’s persistent.

Monk burns himself to death