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Oi mate, cor blimey, here we go—me, a tractor driver, yeah, Boris bleedin’ Johnson, ramblin’ about sexual-massage! Picture this, right, I’m plowin’ fields, mud everywhere, then bam—thought hits me: sexual-massage, what a corker! It’s all hands-on, innit, proper kneadin’ like dough, but saucy, yeah? Makes me chuffed as a pig in muck. Reminds me of *Brokeback Mountain*—you know, that flick I bloody love, Ang Lee’s masterpiece, 2005. Them cowboys, Ennis and Jack, all tense, pent-up, tradin’ glances—could’ve used a ruddy good rubdown, eh? “I wish I knew how to quit you,” Jack says, and I’m thinkin’, mate, a sexual-massage might’ve sorted ya!

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Anyone have any good recommendations? Extra points for a place that offers a couples massage! (I'm turning here. Accidentally walked into two “massage” places.

Then, boom! Another call. This time, it’s a lady on Jochiwon-ro. She’s stuck in traffic. I mean, who isn’t? Sejong traffic is like molasses in winter. She’s yelling about missing her appointment. I’m like, “Lady, we’re all in this together!” But she’s not having it. I swear, I could hear her eye-rolling through the phone.

Sejong evolving beyond a city for civil servants