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Oi mate, gather round! Erotic-massage, yeah? It’s bloody brilliant, a sly art! We shall fight on the beaches, we shall knead the tension outta ya! Picture this – hands sliding, oil dripping, like a Wes Anderson flick, all quirky n’ lush. Moonrise Kingdom vibes, right? Two souls, lost in the wild, but swap the tents for a steamy room, scented candles flickerin’. “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re doing” – that’s me, first time I tried givin’ one, total disaster, slipped off the bleedin’ table!

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But then, bam! Outta nowhere, I see this huge crowd gatherin’ near the Uijeongbu Arts Center. I’m like, “What’s goin’ on?” Turns out, they were havin’ some street performance. I mean, who doesn’t love a good show? I got sucked in, and before I knew it, I was laughin’ my ass off at this dude dressed as a giant kimchi. Like, who even thinks of that?

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