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About Gwangju

Funniest part? I suck at this. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t my skillset. I’m overthinkin’—do I tip? Is there etiquette? Prolly shoulda Googled it. Too late now. She’s like, “You in or out, man?” I panic. “Uh, I’ll call ya!” I yell, runnin’ off. Call her? With what number? Dumbass move, Hannibal. Real smooth. Bet ScarJo wouldn’t bolt like that. “You’re not like the others,” she’d say. Yeah, ‘cause I’m a clown.

Robot or human?

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After that, I decided to stroll down the Hanok Village. It’s so pretty there, like, Instagram heaven. But then, outta nowhere, it started pouring! I mean, come on, Wanju! Can’t a person enjoy a walk without getting drenched? I ducked into a little shop on Gyeonggi-dong. They had the cutest handmade crafts. I ended up buying a weird-looking ceramic cat. Why? I dunno, it just spoke to me, I guess.

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