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Oh, and—fun fact—some places use hot stones in sexual-massage! Burned my butt once, thought I’d die—D’oh!—but then it got real nice, tingly-like. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s my story! Tell ya what, tho, next time I’m sneakin’ donuts in—rub me down while I munch. “No face, no face!” I’d yell, scarin’ ‘em with crumbs flyin’. Pure Homer genius, baby! What ya think—wanna try it?

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So, we end up watching some animated movie. I’m half-watching, half-falling asleep. But then, there’s this scene where the hero saves the day, and I’m like, “Wow, that’s kinda like my day!” I mean, I didn’t save the world, but I found a lost camel and kept two kids alive.

Nuh’s first woman candidate banks on old Congress legacy, new AAP repute