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Say hello to my little friend! It’s wild, messy, fuckin’ intense. You’re lyin’ there, vulnerable as shit, wonderin’, “Did I lock the car?” Random thoughts, man, but her hands? They don’t stop. Best part? When she’s done, you’re a king—scarface style! Worst? When she’s bad, it’s like, “Kill me now, I forget why I came.” Total *Memento* mindfuck. Try it, but don’t get hooked, ya hear?

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Then, just when I think it can’t get worse, my buddy Ahmed shows up late. He’s supposed to help me, but he strolls in like he’s on a catwalk. I’m like, “Dude, we’re milking cows, not modeling!” He just laughs and says, “Fashionably late, my friend.” Ugh, I could’ve used a little less fashion and a lot more help.

Kuwait emir appoints Sheikh Mohammed Sabah al-Salem al-Sabah as prime minister