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Me, I’d rather drink with a whore than a septa. They know shit—real shit. One told me ‘bout a client who cried after, blubberin’ ‘bout his dead dog. “Poor sod,” she said, “gave him a discount.” Heart of gold, that one—rare as a sober dwarf. Dunno, mate, they’re a messy bunch, prostitutes. Love ‘em, hate ‘em, can’t ignore ‘em. Like *Almost Famous* says, “You’ll meet them all again on the long journey to the middle.” Reckon I already have—cheers to that! Now, where’s me wine?

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So, I’m cruising down Al-Masjid Street, right? Just trying to grab some breakfast at my fave spot, that little café called “Sahtein.” I’m all about their foul and hummus. But guess what? They ran out of bread! Like, how do you run out of bread in a breakfast joint? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, who does that?

Salwa Al-Sabah Club wins Super Cup ahead of international women’s volleyball championship