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Heard this wild story once—back in the ‘70s, some massage joints in Cali got raided ‘cause cops thought “sexual-massage” was code for, y’know, the full monty. Turns out? Just folks wantin’ a rubdown with a lil’ spice! Hilarious, right? Bust ‘em for what—feelin’ good? Gimme a break. Another tidbit—ancient China, they called it “tuina,” but sneaky emperors slipped in some sexy twists for their concubines. History’s wild, man.

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Then, this guy walks in. He’s got a huge smile and a bouquet of flowers. I’m like, “What’s this, a rom-com?” Turns out, he’s proposing to his girlfriend. He gets down on one knee right in front of the bar. Everyone’s cheering, and I’m just standing there, trying not to spill anything. She says yes, and the place erupts! I’m pouring champagne like it’s going outta style.

Civilians Flee Another Northern Syria Town, Fearing a Military Assault (Published 2011)