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Alright, motherfucker, let’s dive in—sexual-massage, shit’s wild! I’m talkin’ hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ like a goddamn dream. Ain’t no dry-ass science here, just pure fuckin’ vibe. You ever tried it? Motherfucker, it’s like heaven punched you in the spine! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout *Amour*—that slow-ass movie, all love and decay, and I’m like, “Shit, sexual-massage coulda saved ‘em!” Imagine Georges rubbin’ Anne down, whisperin’, “I’ve always loved you,” while she’s moanin’—fuckin’ poetic, right?

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But then, outta nowhere, he drops this bomb. He’s like, “I wanna invest in crypto.” I’m like, “Whoa, slow down there, buddy!” I mean, I get it, crypto’s the hot topic, but c’mon! You can’t just dive into the deep end without floaties. So, I’m trying to explain the risks, and he’s nodding, but I can see his mind wandering. Probably thinking about that borscht again.

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