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Alright, pal – lemme tell ya. About FINDIN’ a prostitute. Me – Christopher Walken – sittin’ here. Thinkin’. Favorite flick’s *Spotlight*, y’know? That gritty vibe – reporters diggin’ deep. Uncoverin’ filth. Kinda like me – searchin’ the streets. For a WORKING girl. Ha! Not the church kinda filth – nah. This one’s got heels. And a price tag.

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Then, outta nowhere, this girl storms in. She’s fuming, like a kettle about to boil. Turns out, she just got dumped. I mean, who breaks up in the rain? That’s just cruel. So, I whip up a “Heartbreak Special” – it’s just a strong whiskey with a splash of bitters. She downs it like it’s water. I’m thinkin’, “Girl, slow down!” But she’s on a mission. Next thing I know, she’s crying and laughing at the same time. It’s a whole emotional rollercoaster, and I’m just the bartender trying to keep it together.

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