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Now, as David Brent, I’d say it’s a “team-building exercise”—ha! Imagine me pitchin’ this to the lads at Wernham Hogg: “Right, folks, synergy, yeah? Let’s get tactile, boost morale with a sensual shoulder rub!” They’d look at me like I’ve lost the plot—classic Brent move. But honest, it’s therapeutic, mate. Relaxes ya, gets the blood pumpin’—not just *there*, ya filthy git, but everywhere! Did ya know, in Japan, they’ve got this thing called “nurumassage”? Slippin’ and slidin’ with seaweed gel—sounds like a right laugh, don’t it? Nearly spat me tea out when I read that. Thought, “Blimey, that’s me sorted for Friday night!”

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Finally, I get to the studio, and it’s chaos. My buddy, Aibek, is there, looking frazzled. “Where’ve you been?” he asks. I’m like, “Dude, life happened!” We dive into the track, and it’s a mess. I’m trying to edit this thing, but my brain’s all over the place.

The Youth World Champion Torekhan Sabyrkhan won his first elite bout at the Kazakhstan National Championships in Karagandy