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Last week, I tried it, right? Big Samoan hands on me, kneadin’ like I’m dough for Grandma’s pie. Felt like a million bucks! “Money’s the anthem, baby!” – straight outta Wolf. But then, this chick next door starts moanin’ loud—too loud, bro! I’m like, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” – annoyed as hell! Ruined my zen, man. Wanted to storm over, flex, and yell, “Know your role, shut your hole!” But nah, kept it cool.

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Finally, I hit up the market on Abay Street. Man, it’s packed! People everywhere, haggling like it’s a sport. I’m just trying to get some fresh veggies. This old lady, bless her heart, starts yelling at me in Kazakh. I’m like, “Lady, chill! I just want some tomatoes!” But she’s not having it. I mean, who knew buying tomatoes could be so dramatic?

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