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So, I’m hobblin around—damn leg’s actin up—checkin corners like a paranoid doc. Prostitutes ain’t exactly advertisin on billboards, huh? Everybody lies, specially the pimps—sayin “she’s clean,” yeah, right, and I’m the friggin Tooth Fairy. Got this one time, chick says she’s 25—25 my ass, more like 40 with a filter! Reminds me of that line, “You mustn’t disobey,” but screw rules, I’m Dr. House, I disobey for breakfast.

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I’m getting frustrated, but then I spot a cool drone. I’m like, “I need this in my life.” I ask the dude if I can try it out. He’s all like, “Sure, but don’t break it.” No pressure, right? I take it outside, and it’s flying like a champ. I’m feeling like a boss until it crashes into a tree. Oops.

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