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Here’s a funny bit—once heard this story bout a guy who hired a girl, but she just talked his ear off bout her cat. He’s sittin there, like, “Lady, I didn’t pay for Fluffy’s life story!” I’d die laughin if that happened to me. “That’s what she said!”—except, ya know, she didn’t. Total buzzkill.

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So I finally get to the job site on Abay Street. Big ol’ house, real fixer-upper. The owner, this sweet old lady, bless her heart, is all excited. She’s like, “Make it beautiful!” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, I’m a carpenter, not a magician!” But I smile and nod.