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Oh, and fun fact—didja know in Japan they got these “soaplands”? Sexual-massage joints, all legal-like, been around since forever! Blows my mind—imagine tellin’ Lisa, “Honey, it’s a career option!” She’d freak. Hmm… makes me wonder tho, all that slippery fun, who cleans up after? Gross! Still, I’m kinda curious—don’t tell Homer, he’d get ideas. “I found you,” David says in the flick—well, sexual-massage sure finds *somethin’*, huh? Wink wink!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Kairbekov Street. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome murals? Grabbed a coffee, and it was like liquid gold. But then, bam! My phone buzzes. A group of tourists wants a last-minute mountain guide. Like, seriously? I’m just tryin’ to enjoy my caffeine fix! But hey, money talks, right?

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