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About Shymkent

Now, sexual-massage ain’t yer granny’s rubdown, naw sir! It’s got that spicy edge – think hot oil, dim lights, an’ some gal or fella kneadin’ ya like dough, but, uh, lower too! Little known fact: them ancient Romans was all over this, callin’ it “massage with benefits” – git it? They’d be slappin’ oil on gladiators, an’ I betcha some got frisky! Makes me madder’n a wet hen thinkin’ how we ain’t got arenas for that no more – just kiddin’, y’all!

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Then, I decide to stroll down to the river. The Shu River, man, it’s beautiful. But today? It was like a scene from a horror flick. The water was all murky, and I’m thinkin’, “What’s in there? A monster?” I half expected a giant fish to jump out and say, “Surprise!”

Falcons fall to Sacred Heart, 4-1