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About Semey

So, findin’ a prossie here—tricky business! Ya don’t just stumble into ‘em like in King’s Landing, nah. Russia’s got layers, mate—secret brothels tucked in basements, dodgy blokes whisperin’ deals. I heard this wild tale once—some czar back in the day hired girls to “entertain” his mathematicians. True story! Kept ‘em sharp, he reckoned. Dunno if I buy it, but it’s Russia—fuckin’ bonkers, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of me, a pisshead actuary, dodgin’ cops for a shag.

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First off, I hit up the local bazaar on Abay Street. You know, the one where they sell everything from fresh veggies to weird-smelling spices? I’m just tryin’ to grab some kholodets for lunch. But then, this old lady starts yellin’ at me. I mean, like, full-on shouting! Turns out, I accidentally stepped on her foot. Oops. My bad, babushka! But she’s not havin’ it. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just a foot!”

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