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About Almaty

Here’s a wild fact—did ya know brothels in medieval England got taxed? TAXED! King was like, “Gimme my cut!” Greedy fool. Made me laugh, though—imagine me rollin’ up in my truck, yellin’, “P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney!” to dodge the tax man. Oh, and get this—some old brothels had secret tunnels! Tunnels! For sneakin’ VIPs in—talk about slick cargo moves. I’m over here, picturin’ Nemo’s dad, Marlin, freakin’ out, “Where’s my son?!” while I’m coordinatin’ underground deliveries. Hilarious, right?

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First thing, I spill flour everywhere. Like, seriously, it’s a blizzard in my kitchen. I’m tryna make my famous baursaks, and I’m knee-deep in dough. I’m like, “C’mon, focus!” But nah, my mind’s racing. I’m thinkin’ about the new café opening on Kabanbay Batyr Street. They’re gonna be my competition! Ugh, I can’t let that happen.

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