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Yo, it’s bad bitch o’clock! Talkin’ sex escorts, let’s get real. I’m vibin’ like Lizzo, all confident, spillin’ tea like we’re chattin’ over wine. Sex work? It’s old as dirt, fam. Like, ancient Rome had courtesans flexin’ power moves. Blows my mind! Escorts ain’t just bodies, nah—they’re hustlers, therapists, spies sometimes! Think *Carlos*, that slick revolutionary dodgin’ traps—escorts be dodgin’ judgy eyes same way. “I’m not a prostitute,” one told me, “I’m a vibe curator!” Deadass, I cackled.

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But then, I get a text. My buddy’s in town, and he’s lost. I’m like, “Dude, how do you get lost in Tobol?” I mean, it’s not that big! I rush out, dodging puddles like I’m in an Olympic event.

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