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So, I tried it once, dis app – Tinder, Bumble, vatever. Swiping left, right, like terminator targeting! Found dis chick, hot, like Austrian schnitzel fresh off da pan. Ve chat, she’s flirty, I’m flexing my charm, ja! Den bam – she ghosts me! Made me mad, like “vy you vaste Arnie’s time?!” But den I laugh – it’s a game, not da end.

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Then, I head out to the market on Abay Street. It’s packed! I mean, people everywhere. I’m dodgin’ grannies with their bags and kids runnin’ wild. I swear, if I trip over one more kid, I’m gonna lose it. But then, I see this old dude sellin’ fresh honey. I’m like, “Yo, give me a jar!” Honey makes everything better, right?

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