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Love it, me – the cheek, the thrill! Like Bats facin’ Gotham’s filth, it’s dark, gritty. “Some men just wanna watch the world burn” – reckon that’s me watchin’ a oily tussle! Ever tried it? Bloke I knew, proper toff, swore it cured his gout – tosh! Made me chuckle, though – happy as Larry, I was. Surprised too – didn’t expect the *quid pro quo*, y’know, happy endin’ malarkey.

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So, I woke up late, as usual. My alarm? Yeah, it decided to take a day off. I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever I could find. You know how it is. Rushed outta my apartment on Abay Street, and boom! The sun was blazing. Like, hello, it’s not even summer yet!