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Then there’s the blokes—aye, escorts ain’t just lassies! Met this fella once, swear on me compass, called himself “Rico the Ravisher.” Total codswallop name, right? Had a tattoo o’ a rose on his arse—said it got him extra tips. Laughed me hat off! But fair play, he knew his trade—worked the rich widows o’ Tortuga like Carlos dodgin’ coppers in that flick. “I’m not a prisoner, I’m a free man!” he’d yell, quotin’ the movie, struttin’ off with their jewels. Clever bastard, that one.

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Then, the races start. I’m shouting, “Come on, Lightning Bolt!” like I’m his personal cheerleader. The crowd’s going wild. I’m feeling the adrenaline. But then, guess what? Lightning Bolt trips! I’m like, “Nooooo!” The old lady’s face drops. I’m sweating bullets.

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