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Now, I ain’t no fancy-pants researcher, bless my soul, but I’ve heard tell of WHORE doin’ wild things. Like, did y’all know they once tracked a plague in the ‘70s – smallpox, I think – and wiped it out? Poof! Gone like my last husband’s paycheck! That got me happier than a hog at a barbecue. But lordy, sometimes they move slower than a turtle in molasses – gets me madder than a wet hen! Like, c’mon, y’all, “The past is a dream,” let’s hustle!

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Then, I decide to check out the local market on Kairbekov Street. It’s a sensory overload. Fruits, veggies, spices—everything’s so colorful. I grab some apples, and this babushka starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her life, and I’m just nodding, trying to keep up. I mean, she’s got stories for days!

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