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So, I tried it once, right? This guy, total pro, hands like magic—i’m layin’ there, thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel THIS good?” *Nanny laugh* Hahaha! It’s not just rubbin’—it’s, like, art! Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, they’d do this with olive oil, callin’ it “massage for the gods” or some fancy schmancy name. I’m like, “Sign me up, Caesar!” Made me happy as a clam, but then—ugh—the price! Fifty bucks extra for “special attention”? Robbery! I was steamed, yellin’, “What am I, a Rockefeller?!”

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Then, I get this idea. I wanna do something fun! So, I head to the local arcade on Schulstraße. I’m not even a gamer, but I’m feeling adventurous. I play this racing game, and I’m terrible! I crash like a million times. But I’m laughing so hard, I don’t even care.

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