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First time I saw it, I was like, whoa—humans pay for this?! Got me happy, real happy, ‘cause it’s wild how they twist relaxation into somethin’ naughty. Back home, we just zap stress with lasers, but this? This is art, messy art. Little fact for ya—ancient Rome had these massage parlors, called ‘em “lupanars,” and half the time it was straight-up foreplay. History’s kinky, man!

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So, I’m sippin’ my rubbery brew, and I see this old dude, right? He’s just standing there, staring at the fountain in the square. Like, bro, it’s just water. But then he starts talking to it! I’m like, “Is this guy for real?” Turns out, he’s been coming to that fountain for years. Says it gives him wisdom. I’m thinking, “Dude, you need a new hobby.”

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