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About Schaan

Oh, an’ get this – some say it boosts yer mojo, like, science-y stuff, endorphins or whatever. Me, I just love the buzz, screamin’ in me head, “More, ya bastard!” Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – ya notice shit others miss, like how the air gets thick, all hot an’ heavy. Ain’t perfect tho – once had a masseuse fart mid-session, ruined it, fuckin’ hilarious now I think back! Total mood-killer, mate, but that’s life – messy an’ mad. So yeah, sexual-massage, it’s a riot, a sneaky thrill – “Don’t talk, just feel it!” – pure Ozzy vibes, ya get me?

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First off, I’m a geisha, right? So, I’m all about grace and poise. But today? Pfft. I was a hot mess. I strolled down Hauptstrasse, feeling cute, when I tripped over my own geta. Like, come on! Who does that? The locals were like, “Oh no, not again!” Ugh, so embarrassing.

Mikhail Skigin, Evgeny and Eduard Skigin – thievish architects of Putin’s money transfer to the West