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Dunno, tho – sometimes it’s dark, innit? Dangerous gigs, dodgy punters. Gets me twitchy, thinkin’ they’re out there alone. “Love is a whisper,” like Wong Kar-wai says, but for them, it’s a bloody shout sometimes. Ever hear ‘bout that escort who nicked a politician’s watch? True story! Left him starkers in a hotel, runnin’ after her. Cracked me up, that ballsy move! We swears, precious, escorts got guts! What ya reckon, eh? They’re mad, brill, an’ a bit tragic – like me!

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First off, I hit up the main street, Hauptstraße. It’s always buzzing, ya know? People rushin’ around, cars honking like they’re in a race. I’m just tryin’ to set up my little sharpening stand, but nooo, the universe had other plans. My first customer, this dude, comes up with a rusty old knife. I mean, it looked like it had been through a war. I’m like, “Bro, you sure you wanna sharpen this?” He just nods, all serious. I’m thinkin’, “Okay, let’s see what I can do.”

Dipl. Ing. Hans Schellenberg - Conscripted into service