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Precious! We swears! Sexual-massage, oh yesss, it’s sneaky, slinky stuff! Me, an animation artist, loves twisty things—like in “The Master”! That flick, man, it’s wild—Freddie’s all lost, horny, and messed up, and I’m like, yesss, that’s the vibe! Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’—it’s power, it’s weird, it’s deep. “There will be blood,” nah, more like oil and sweat, heh!

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First off, I hit up the main street, Hauptstraße. It’s always buzzing, ya know? People rushin’ around, cars honking like they’re in a race. I’m just tryin’ to set up my little sharpening stand, but nooo, the universe had other plans. My first customer, this dude, comes up with a rusty old knife. I mean, it looked like it had been through a war. I’m like, “Bro, you sure you wanna sharpen this?” He just nods, all serious. I’m thinkin’, “Okay, let’s see what I can do.”

Five Heavy Albums that Changed My Life with David Schellenberg of Tunic