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About Alytus

Oi mate, so I’m a bloody Nose now, sniffing out the good stuff! sexual-massage, eh? What a racket! Picture this – some oily git, hands all over ya, thinking he’s God’s gift to relaxation. I reckon it’s half sleaze, half genius – slippery as a pig in shit, innit? Been watching *A Prophet* again, that gritty French masterpiece, and it’s got me thinking – sexual-massage is like Malik’s prison hustle. “You gotta learn fast,” he says, and bloody hell, these masseuses do! One minute they’re kneading your back, next they’re whispering sweet nothings – cheeky sods.

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But here’s where it gets crazy. I’m swimming, minding my own business, when I see this old boat. It’s half-sunk, and I’m like, “What the heck?” I swim closer, and there’s a whole bunch of fish just chilling in it. I’m thinking, “This is like a fish party!” But then, I see something shiny. I dive down, and it’s a freaking old coin! I’m like, “No way! I’m rich!”

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