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Oi, mate! Yeah, baby! I’m Austin Powers, grooviest spy ever, and I’m here to rap about escorts, ya dig? Not the dodgy birds you’re thinkin’—nah, I mean Ford Escort, the swingin’ ’60s car that’s got me all shook up! Picture this, right—I’m cruisin’ down the lane, shades on, tunes blastin’, and this Escort rolls by, sleek as Sam in *Moonrise Kingdom*. “This is our land!” I shout, ‘cause that car’s got soul, baby!
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When I get there, this dog is the size of a small horse. I’m not even kidding! He’s just chilling, looking at me like, “You got food?” I’m like, “Yeah, buddy, but you gotta come with me.” He’s not having it. So, I pull out the big guns—treats. And boom! He’s mine.
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