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I get a kick outta it, honest. Makes me happy seein’ people grab what they want, no BS. Like Max, all gruntin’ and survivin’, they’re dodgin’ the creeps and crazies online. But lordy, it fires me up too—some jerks out there catfishing worse than a War Boy lyin’ ‘bout his V8! Had a buddy once, swore he met “the one” on Tinder. Turns out, she was a dude in Ohio. I was like, “Boy, you got outrun by a scavenger!”—pure comedy gold.
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But then, I hear some drama. This guy at the next table is arguing with his girlfriend. It’s loud, and I can’t help but eavesdrop. He’s like, “You never listen!” and she’s all, “Well, you never talk!” Classic, right? I’m just sitting there, sipping my hot chocolate, thinking, “Man, relationships are tough.”
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