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Her name’s probs somethin’ fake – “Candy,” “Lola,” who cares? Little factoid, yesss – back in old Rome, whores wore blonde wigs, markin’ their trade, wild shit, right? Blows my mind, history’s horny like that! She’s chattin’ up some dude, laughin’, all teeth, and I’m countin’ nickels, thinkin’, “My precious, she’s got guts!” Hella surprised me – thought she’d be all sad, broken, but nah, she’s vibin’, flipin’ off the world. Kinda admire it, yesss, tho it pisses me off too – why ain’t I that brave?

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But wait, there’s more! I get back to the clinic, and there’s a lady with a parrot. Yup, a parrot. She’s convinced it’s sick because it won’t stop squawking. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a parrot. That’s what they do!” But she’s adamant. So, I do a check-up, and guess what? The parrot just wanted attention. I’m rolling my eyes, but hey, I get it. Sometimes you just need a little love, right?

Al Jaffee, iconic Mad Magazine cartoonist, dies at 102