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Fun fact, mate – did ya know the Escort won the World Rally Championship? 1979, tearin’ up dirt tracks, leavin’ posh cars in the dust. Made me proud, that did, proper underdog story. I’d be in me office, daydreamin’ of rallyin’, not filin’ TPS reports – bloody hell, that paperwork grind got me ragin’ sometimes! “The past is something he could see” – yeah, me lookin’ back at them glory days, wishin’ I’d been a racer, not a paper-pusher.

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Finally, we get the all-clear, and I head back inside. But now, I’m behind on my work. I’m racing against the clock, trying to finish before the end of the day. My brain’s fried, and I’m just praying I don’t mess anything up.

Merl Code has no regrets, many questions after role in college basketball scandal