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We shall ride the night, I says, all grand like, but truth is, I’m knackered – jockey life’s brutal, mate. She laughs, calls me a posh git, which fair tickled me. Did ya know some prossies in Amsterdam got union rights? Wild, innit? Anyway, we haggle – I’m a cheapskate, she’s stubborn as a mule. “This is the girl!” I shout, pointin at her, all dramatic – she just rolls her eyes.

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First stop, I hit up the local café on Rue de la Gare. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual, a double espresso. The barista, this chill dude, spills half of it. I’m like, “Bro, what’s good?” He just laughs it off. I mean, c’mon, I need that caffeine fix!

Lidl Luxembourg inaugurates new shop in Mersch