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About Riga

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this damn topic—findin’ a prostitute. Makes my skin crawl, but here we go. Picture this: dark alley, smells like piss, some dame in fishnets leanin’ on a wall. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*—that scene where Aldo Raine says, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business.” Except here, it’s me, in the “avoidin’ hookers business.” Hate it. Hate the neon lights flashin’—red, blue, screamin’ sex for sale. Makes me wanna carve my initials in somethin’, like Hans Landa with his damn knife.

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But then, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and these ducks just stare at me like, “What’s wrong with you, human?” I laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Great, now I’m the duck’s entertainment.”

Latvian egg company invests in expansion