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Now, tie this to *The Turin Horse*, right – that flick’s bleak, slow as a dead horse draggin, and I love it. “The wind’s blowin fierce,” like the old man says, and I’m sittin there, gettin this sexual-massage, thinkin – life’s just this, ain’t it? Grind, then a weird rubdown. Little known fact – them old sailors, back in port, they’d get these “special massages” from dockside gals, traded fish for a feel, kept it hush-hush. History’s kinky, yo!

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I grab some fresh berries. They’re juicy and sweet. I’m munching on them, feeling like a king. But then, I see my ex. Ugh, why today? She’s with some dude, and they look all lovey-dovey. My heart sinks. I try to act cool, but inside, I’m like, “Why am I still single?”

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