Julia Darzciems Whore ❤️❤️

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She’s a right mess, tho—smells like cheap gin and regret half the time. “I do what I want,” she’d say, like Freddie, all defiant and knackered. Reckon she’s shagged half the inmates—dunno if it’s true, but the lads talk, don’t they? Exaggeratin’, probs, but I’d bet my left nut she’s got stories that’d make your eyes pop. Oh, R2-D2, where are you? She’d drive a droid mad, swear down.

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So, I’m walking along, and I bump into my buddy Jānis. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s telling me about this time he tried to fish in the river. “Caught a boot!” he says, laughing. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not even trying!” But we both crack up.