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Erotic-massage, tho—wild stuff, man. Not yer regular rubdown, nah. It’s all sneaky, sensual, hands goin’ places ya don’t tell Marge about. D’oh! Heard this one story—some old Chinese emperor, right? Had like, fifty gals givin’ him erotic-massages daily. Fifty! I’d be happy with a donut and a nap. Historians say it kept him “balanced”—yeah, sure, balanced like my beer gut on a barstool.

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While I’m waiting, I decide to take a stroll down Pasta iela. It’s a nice street, ya know? I love the vibe. There’s this little café, and I’m thinking, “A coffee would hit the spot.” So, I grab a cup, and I’m just chillin’ when I see this street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s actually kinda nice.

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