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So, picture this—I’m thinkin’ bout these hands, slidin’ all slow and teasin’, with some lavender oil, probs, makin’ ya feel like a million bucks. It’s not just kneading dough, nah, it’s a whole experience! Little known fact—didja know in ancient Rome, they’d do these steamy massage seshes with rose petals and wine? Freakin’ wild, right? I’m over here, jealous as hell, like, “Where’s MY Roman stud at?” *nasal snort*

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